Dealing with Fake Friends

No new friends? 

Not all of us are lucky enough to keep the same friendships we've had for 5 years+. People change, grow apart and as much as we hate to admit it, outgrow one another. I've definitely had many, many people come and go in my life but the main advice I can give to you is don't take it personal.

When we face rejection- whether it be from an interview, a break-up, a friend sending you 3 paragraphs through iMessage about all the things you've done wrong; that shit can hit you hard. 

Look at me for example, I lost 2 best friendships in people that I've known over 10 years for the dumbest reasons. Of course, it's going to suck and the reality hits you that they are no longer in your life, but you can turn this into a positive.

Can you think of a reason why a "friend" cut you off?

• Jealousy
• Miscommunication
• Made new friends
• Moved
• Slept with her boyfriend  girrrrrrl, not me but I've heard stories
• Manipulative 
• Other

In my case, jealousy and miscommunication were the leading factors. Remind yourself that if this person decides you no longer fit in their life based on petty reasons then run the other way. 

Trust me, they're doing you a favor. 🙄

Losing a friendship is truly like going through a bad breakup, maybe even worse. You've known this person for so long (or have you?), you've told them so many secrets, invited them around your family and probably have the same circle. It's not easy at all but just like a breakup, you'll move on. 

You are forced out of your comfort zone and your security blanket of the same friends/personalities. Be yourself and go find meaningful friendships in people that actually deserve it.

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Let's not forget- sometimes, the problem really can be us. We can neglect our friends, not check up on them or make time with them as much as we should. Being defensive is one thing, but it takes a level of maturity to step back and see if any of their points are valid.

I can fully admit that there are times I probably haven't been the greatest friend. The important thing is that I'm growing as a person and that I want to be more aware of my actions and words.

Growing up in NYC really shows you how different the culture and community is here, compared to other cities, states and countries even. If we could all be more aware of how we treat other people (strangers or not) in this city, then maybe happiness could finally be a #trend.

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Any nasty friendship breakups? Need advice?

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